Life Changed Forever ..

Six days ago my life changed forever:

I got engaged.

I put a rock on a finger and made a commitment to constantly pursue.

A massive leap from the world of dating into a very permanent role just short of marriage. While its still soaking in, slowly but surely, being engaged to Paige Mullins is by far the most incredible thing I’ve ever experienced. Just the last 6 days — I’ve developed into a guy with a completely different mindset:

I’m preparing for a life with the girl of my dreams.

While this fact is extremely real, sometimes scary, and all-the-while freakin’ exciting — it’s something that I do not take lightly. It’s taking a huge leap of faith, trusting that God will bless your relationship in ways unimaginable. It’s telling God that you are ready to experience Him on a whole new level, with a wife.

I was at a cousin’s wedding about 5 years ago and while at the Rehearsal Dinner, the groom stood up and vowed to his Bride that he will “constantly pursue her.

Now..the word PURSUE is defined in many contexts as this:

  • To strive to gain or accomplish:
  • To proceed along the course of; follow
  • To carry further; advance
  • To be engaged in
  • To court

Something I’ve noticed in relationships is that husbands/wives stop:

  • pursuing
  • courting
  • engaging
  • advancing
  • striving for more

after a certain amount of time. I’ve seen couples together for the pure fact of raising kids. I’ve seen couples that have just found out the hard way that they have become dysfunctional as a couple and in fact have NOTHING in common. I’ve seen couples who go through unexpected tragedy, thus growing apart during the grieving process. These couples are forced to almost start over and re-pursue each other.

I stumbled across this verse this morning:

Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting

– Ephesians 5:25 (The Message)

Now, i’m not married yet, but am I supposed to START this process the day I get married? Don’t think so — It’s a progression through dating, into engagement, and a continuation through marriage. Not only a continuation, but a conscious effort to grow/pursue/love/engage/court/strive for more at an increasing rate, always making her feel valued, and consistently show her the love of Christ.

My aim, even through dating Paige, and especially during our engagement leading up to marriage — is to constantly pursue her. Reach out to her in new ways, listen when she needs to talk, get lost in conversation, weekly date nights without the cell phones, spontaneous surprises, massage her feet after a long day, and going out of my way to make her smile. To make her always feel loved and valued is my focus — and I’m pumped about continuing this journey into the next phase of our lives.

Paige and I would love any advice you may have during this big step towards marriage. Feel free to e-mail, tweet, FB message, text, call, or comment. (wow, technology, wow)



8 responses to “Life Changed Forever ..

  • Nicole

    Wow, thats some good writing right there Mr. Lane. I love reading your blogs! So happy for you and Paige! Hope to get to know her and you better!

  • Gordona

    Wow. So refreshing to see someone who gets it so early on. You are right on target! And if she makes the same commitment to you…then you will be both be off to a great start. My advice…would be to never take each other for granted. Never think you are immune to problems within your relationship. Don’t be too proud to ask for help…it doesn’t matter if its been one year or ten. And most important…never ever ever ever buy a new gun without discusiing it with her first. 🙂 love you two and so happy to have you in our family.

  • Writing is Pursuing

    […] of my friends (who has a great blog – shameless plug) recently wrote about the importance of pursuing a woman, about how women were meant to be chased, and caught, and chased some more. […]

  • Sam Lorton


    I know I have not had the privilege of meeting you (yet!) I have known Paige for many years. She and her family helped guide me through one of the hardest times of my life.We attended the same church for awhile and even though I have not seen her in quite sometime, I know one thing is for sure… She is one amazing woman! And I cannot tell you how happy your post has made me. She deserves nothing less than the best and I can see just by your post that you are a blessing to her life!

    This post also inspired and reminded me of what I want out of life, out of a partner, out of a soulmate. Thank you so much and I am so incredibly happy for you both! Congratulations and may God bless you both more than any words can describe!


    • mtlane


      She is very much an amazing woman. Blessed to be her fiance, for sure!

      Sam — thanks for your comments. They mean so much to me, and I know for Paige as well.


  • Love Extravagantly .. « Defining the Undefined..

    […] this time, as an engaged guy, I aim to never get to that point. I’m sure some of you reading just shook your head as if to […]

  • Kristina S

    You are very mature and wise. God has blessed you both and you have an amazing future ahead! Congrats on your engagement!

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